Today went from worse to worst in a matter of minutes. I don't know...I'm just so upset...and I know I should be thankful...and I am. But I'm so upset. I need to write because I just don't want to talk to anyone, I just need to spill out...this.

My best friend, her family and her boyfriend all got into a huge car crash coming home from San Francisco earlier today. They're all okay. Mr. T has a broken arm, Carley a broken ankle, Mrs. T a broken hand, Loyd's clavicle is broken, and my best friend and her little brother got away with bruises. She called me while I was at work but I couldn't answer - I didn't think it was anything serious, I just thought she was calling to let me know she was home. But I called her back and she told me everything that happened (half-crying) and I was just so shocked. I didn't know what to do, what to say. It was like...What if I had lost them? What if I had lost her...?

I cannot imagine my life without Caitie. Even though she's hundreds of miles away I could never imagine my life without her in it...if she weren't in it...I wouldn't have...anything in a way. She's my everything. I don't know how else to explain it; she's part of me, and if she ever went away I would be...

I really don't know who I would be.

I asked her what happened and apparently a car flew across the median and hit them - they weren't at all expecting it. Caitie kept saying how she hoped the other car was okay, that they were waiting to hear what happened to them...but...and I feel badly about this...all I was thinking was, Who the hell cares about them? How the hell did they come across the median? I was so mad at "them" - they had almost taken away my best friend in the entire world and a family that is honestly like my own. They had almost taken it all - in an instant.

I just feel numb. I'm thankful that they're okay but to have such a scare like that is something that has never happened to me, and I just can't shake this feeling.