Can you ever truly be happy AND NOT hurt a person's feelings?
I don't think it's possible.
What a sucky oxymoron.
While that's been on my mind lately, one facet of desire has turned from a leak into a flood.
MOVING. OUT.
My parents and I have finally come to that "stage." Our tolerance for one another is waning. It's like a foul odor hanging in the air. Moving out is the Febreeze.
It's not that I don't love my parents or they don't love me. It's just that neither one of us wants to live with each other anymore.
Isn't it weird that after 20 years (minus the 1 I spent in Santa Barbara) of living together that we just CAN'T anymore? It's like getting a divorce, except not damaging to our relationship, oh yeah, and they're my parents. In fact, it will greatly HELP our relationship.
The only reason I've lived at home up to this point is because I don't want to "waste" money on an apartment I'd have to get in the IE because of my school. But is it really wasting money to not get into fights every month over trivial matters? Is it really wasting money to live in an apartment that's organized, clean, and Ikea-decked-out? Is it REALLY wasting money to be a happier, better, calmer me?
No, my friends. It is not a waste of money.
My sanity needs it. My parents' sanity needs it. WE NEED IT.
So, I've started to make plans. Subject to change as always, but plans nonetheless. By next school year I want to be living on my own (with roommates of course) either by my campus or on campus, depending on the roomie situation. Another possible option is that if Josh gets an apartment (if he gets that job at FedEx) I'd be able to live with him which, considering everything, I'd REALLY have to think about. But even if I don't move in with him, I'd always be at his place anyway. So long as I have an "escape" from home where I could stay for a week, or two, or three, I'm happy.
I guess the only other thing I have an update on is getting back in shape. I joined the gym earlier this month because I have gained SO much weight in only a year (thank you fast food and late night eating expeditions!) and it's simply ridiculous. I just don't feel healthy. And I'm not. I've been going diligently at least five times a week. I've built up my endurance to run over 3 miles a day and I burn 500+ calories every workout, which I'm super proud of because I HATE to run. Before I realized how bad it was getting I had no motivation to excercise at all. But I really had a HUGE wake-up call. I've lost 2 pounds in two weeks. That's a pretty epic deal considering what I can do before summer's here. I want to lose about 20 pounds. If I can lose 10 by summer I will be ecstatic! This year has been all about fulfilling goals and so far I've managed to do a number of them. I know I'll accomplish this one.
Excercising's awesome, but the thing I struggle most with is my eating habits. Soda is my drug. I need an intervention, but it's all around me, everywhere I go. The guy sitting next to me in this computer lab is sipping on a Sprite. It's honestly scary. I'd really like to do some research on hardcore soda-drinkers to see if they could stop drinking soda for an entire year. I did it once for 6 months for swimming. I know I can do it...I just need to be stronger.
Also, going to a Sum 41 concert in March! Random but I'm looking forward to it!
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